Okay, so I guess my Venus site was a royal flop, but whatever.


[link]

This is Green Star, a college for people with "special talents". These roleplays are always a lot of fun, so I thought I'd open another one. I like this atmosphere I've got going in this one.

So yeah. Check it out. Whatevers.

ANYWAY.

Long stories short, I've been working a lot lately. Jay and I have our two-month anniversary today; he didn't know that until I mentioned it, but whatever. I've left Foodworks now, and moved over to the bakery, where the workers (and the employers!) actually have souls; the only drawback is the heat. On the plus side, I don't have to buy bread anymore. Yays.

Today's my day off, so I'm taking the opportunity to just kinda sit around in my pajamas and ignore the world. It's nice.

Alrighty guys, have a great day/week/whatever. I'll see y'all around.

Xx Ciaoski.

About Me

1. real name:
Ricky

2. like it:
Yeah

3. single or taken:
Taken.

4. zodiac sign:
Virgo

5. male or female:
Male

6. age:
19

7. height:
6'2"

8. lucky number:
142.5

9. eye color:
blue-green with yellow flecks

10. hair color:
mousy blonde

11. long or short:
shortish

12. marital status:
Not married

13. are you a health freak?
NO.

14. Weight:
Never check

15. do you have a crush on someone:
Heh prettymuch

16. do you like yourself:
Most of the time.

17. piercings:
None

18. tattoos:
None

19. righty or lefty:
Righty.

20. fav color:
Green / Brown

21. least fav color:
Purple

FIRSTS

22. first kiss:
With a guy 21 year old, I was 14, in my bedroom.

23. first piercing:
17, but it's gone now.

24. first best friend:
Sam

25. first award:
School English Prize

26. first sport:
Don't do sport.

27. first pet:
Paige, my dog.

28. first vacation:
Phillip Freakin' Island. Damn.

29. first car:
Laser. Eww.

30. first crush:
Lee

CURRENTLY

31. what time is it:
2:21

32. where are you:
Home.

33. wish:
I was better

34. about to:
Get an opinion on my sprites

35. listening to:
Hilltop Hoods

36. waiting for:
Halloween.

37. wearing:
monkey PJ pants, black shirt

38. annoyed about:
Illiteracy, Climate Change... you name it.

39. eating:
My fingernail

40. drinking:
Nothing

FUTURE

41. want kids?:
Not for a while.

42. want to get married?:
Yes.

43. careers in mind?:
Actor, Author, other than that I don't care.

44. dream car?:
1949 Valiant Chevrolet

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE (PREFERRED) SEX

45. lips or eyes?:
Eyes.

46. hugs or kisses:
Both.

47. shorter or taller:
Taller.

48. tan skinned or light:
Light.

49. romantic or spontaneous:
Romantic.

50. dark or light hair:
Either one.

51. built, fat, muscular, skinny, or normal:
Skinny

52. hook up or relationship:
Depends.

53. similar to you or different:
Depends.

54. trouble maker or hesitant:
Hesitant.

HAVE YOU EVER

55. kissed a stranger:
Yes.

56. drank bubbles:
Yes.

57. ate a crayon:
No.

58. lost glasses/contacts:
Not mine... hehe

59. climbed up a tree:
Lots

60. broken someone's heart:
Yes.

61. been arrested:
No.

62. turned someone down:
Yes.

63. cried when someone died:
Yeah...

64. liked a friend as more than a friend:
Story of my life, bucko.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN

65. yourself:
Yes. More than anything else.

66. miracles:
Kind of.

67. ghosts:
I guess.

68. love at first sight:
No.

69. santa clause:
No.

70. heaven and hell:
Not in the traditional sense.

71. kissing on the first date:
Of course.

72. God:
Let's not go there, shall we?

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY

73. Is there one person you want to be with right now?
Yes.

74. Who is it?
Jay.

75. Do you kiss on the first date?
How about someone takes me on a first date, first, huh?

76. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time?
No...You can do that? That's allowed?

77. Last time you flossed?
Err... I don't floss.

78. Last time checked for STDs?
Er...

79. Fart in public?
Everyone does.

80. Flirt with your friends boyfriend or girlfriend?
Sometimes. For fun. But only when both parties are present.

81. Cheat on a partner?
No.

82. Whats under your bed?
Er...

83. Last time you cleaned your toilet?
Um...

84. Ever sprout hairs on your chin?
Only every fucking day.

85. Does the carpet match the curtains?
Err...yeah.

86. Last kiss?
Too long ago...

87. Last booty call?
A few months. Oh damn.

88. 7th text received?
Inbox = empty.

89. 4th missed call?
Aleesha.

90. Last comment received?
Discussion of my Batman Villains

91. Sleep with a stuffed animal?
Yeah. Ethan, my blue teddy.

92. Last time you cried?
The other day. It was a sick, tired, frustrated venty cry.

93. Pee in pools?
Ew. No.

94. Ever stolen something?
Yes.

95. Ever drink milk from the carton?
Yep. Proud, too.

96. Mad at anyone?
Pretty damn annoyed, but not mad.

97. Ever rock a mullet?
Yes.

98. Last tuxedo worn?
My deb.

99. Last video game played
Pokemon Emerald.

LA FEMME
Brand spanking new University Student Courtney Strait moves to the inner city and is delighted when she lands her first job since leaving home and is able to move into her own apartment - right above the bar! It isn't until she meets the other staff that she realises that something might not be quite right...

"La Femme!" A Drag Musical about fitting in, falling out, and 'where to tuck Charlie'...

------------

That's right kids, I'm starting a new work. Now, it's hard to post up different sections when you're writing a play. With my novels it's easy enough because there are specific chapters that I can post up one after the other; easily marked milestones. With a play, not so much. Posting up a whole ACT at once is far too much, but each scene would get annoying. Any ideas on how I should put this one up?

Also, the stage directions in it are kinda over specific. There are a couple of contributing factors that led to this.
1 - I'm pedantic.
2 - I want to clearly establish the differences in character personalities and mannerisms
3 - It makes it a little more interesting to read on dA, since it will probably never make it to stage anyway hence none of you will see it


Ssooooo yeah. Anyway, look out for new pieces of that. If you have any ideas how I should post it up, please comment, it would be a huge help.

Anyway.

Bryan invited Jay and I to a toga party he's hosting. Jay's 18th happens to be the same day, so we had to regretfully decline. I actually kind of breathed a sigh of relief because of that, because as much as I love Bryan....... I love Bryan.

It's for the best for EVERYONE if I don't spend time with him, particularly if he's in a toga. Plus, I would probably wind up seeing him with his boyfriend and then I would have had one of my mental collapse periods where I keep up my social mask but just want desperately to leave and... well, yeah, make believe I'm fine and break down later. That is undesired.

Sooooo we said we couldn't go, since it's Jay's party that same night. I was glad... until Bryan and Jay decided that they would arrange something else. All of a sudden Bryan wants Jay and I to go up there and stay with him, IN HIS HOUSE for a few days, and chances are that Bryan's boyfriend will be there too.

I nearly had a heart attack. That's like... my worst nightmare. I mean, really, I do NOT want to be in a house alone with just Jay/Bryan/Sam, it would be torture. And it's really not fair on Jay that I feel this way.

I love Jay. I'm glad I'm with him, don't get me wrong. Every moment I'm with him I'm happy. But.
My feelings for Bryan are really special and... it's a completely unique feeling. It's going to be a long, long time before I can get over that, and I really don't want to have to see him with someone else. I'm happy for him, and he can talk to me about it - hell, I kinda counselled him through the initial process to help him get together with Sam because I wanted him to be happy... but I'd rather he's happy somewhere I don't have to see it.

I'm sure you all understand what I'm talking about there. Right?

I just want to spend time alone with Jay. Just the two of us, in his bed in the bungalo, watching Smallville and Heroes and talking about the potential for human beings to develop superpowers... writing parodies of popular songs to make them about Pokemon, debating our different beliefs on human nature, stuff like that.

That's when I'm happiest, and to be completely honest I feel like I'm burning right down to the wire at the moment. All I want is to be with him alone for a few days.

But not at Bryan's, and not with Bryan and Sam there. That sounds like torture.

Aaaaaanyway, I'm organising two special packages at the moment. One of them is for Alia. It's a very late birthday present (I'M SORRY!) which has some special significance for us. She'll understand when she gets it. The other one is something for Fiyero (Chin up honey, love you. *kiss on the forehead*) because he's feeling a bit down. So everybody give him some love, okay? I'm going to give him something particularly special, he just needs to get together the money to pay the Postal Recieving Tax... poor guy.

Besides that, Kasey and I are going to Ash's place tomorrow night. We're gonna go play in the spa and meet Ash's pet lambs, and then she's gonna drive me to work the next morning at the bakery. I'm working Friday/Saturday/Sunday from 11am until 6pm, then I have Monday off and work Tuesday 11am to 6pm again. After that, I'm not sure when I work.

And I'm fairly sure that I'm leaving Foodworks. I've just been reminded what it's like to work for someone who sees you as a human being, not a number. I don't care if the liquor department has air conditioning and a cool room, the bakery has a SOUL.

....And free Chai Latte, baked goods and pies. I mean COME ON! haha

Alrighty kids. Now that I've spoken my thoughts on an INCREDIBLY public profile, I think I'm gonna go try to write some more and then collapse into bed. You all have a good day/night now, okay? I love each and every one of you.

Cate, Joel, Alia, Fiyero, Alex, Theresa, Johnny, Eve, all of you. If there's anyone I've missed I'm sorry, YOU SHOULD COMMENT MORE OFTEN. XD

So be on the look out for the first section of La Femme, the next chapter of Venus (when I get around to it - SORRY!) and whatever else comes up in the next few days.

Until next time, see you all around! ^_^

Xx Ricky.

I've poured hours of effort into peoples' lives.

I've been there for people through thick and thin, through the most horrific of circumstances, and I've never let anyone down when they really needed me. I've walked in the dark at two in the morning through rain when I was so ill the doctors feared for my life, only caring to help a friend in need.

That's why I don't like being lied to.

When I have a friend who I've given tremendous amounts of effort to, who I have striven to help, and, especially recently, have spent a lot of time with, I want... no, I /expect/ them to be honest with me.

When someone lies to me, I will confront them.

Then... said person complained to their boyfriend about it, and he /threatened/ me. I will NOT be threatened.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I never made it to Dracula's this weekend. I feel awful for blowing off Emerald and the others like that. The simple explanation is this:

Tara offered me a place to stay.
Thursday before the night, she pulled out.
Amy offered me a place to stay.
Friday night at 11.30pm she too pulled out.
Joel couldn't offer me a place to stay.
The performance was Saturday.

Besides that, I've had a lot going on this week. By the end of it I was in such an emotional state that I felt I was starting to lose control. I've been hearing things again, and all I want to do is cry all the time. I couldn't bear the idea of staying with Cate's grandmother. She's a lovely person, but I didn't want to be a burden, and for some reason I just felt like I was going to drag everybody else down with me if I went, and not even enjoy the night myself.

So I just didn't go. I got on a bus and went to Jay's house, turned off my phone, and watched X-Men with him. In the morning I felt so much better, I can't even explain it. But then, as soon as I got home and turned my phone back on I got messages from a friend I previously trusted.

It's a long story, but it involves her doing something incredibly disrespectful to me, then lying about it, and eventually having her boyfriend threaten me. I refuse to tolerate this behaviour.

I've told her I am taking at least five days of personal time, away from other people, starting tonight. I've had quite enough of being stood up, locked out, lied to, and having people turn their backs on me. It's about time I turned my back on them for once. I've had enough.

Once again, I sound overly dramatic in my journals.

Yeah. I guess I am dramatic...

But why would anyone lie to me?

Xx Ricky.

So. Seeing Bryan in hospital was nice. Then Rachel and I went out and decided to catch up with Yuhan. Before we could meet Yuhan Rachel started to feel as though she was going to have a seizure (being Epileptic) so she said that she needed a sugar hit. We stopped off at this lovely little restaurant called Dumplings Plus, and waited for Yuhan (Rachel ate in the meantime).

Anyway, afterwards we went out together. Long story short... y'know when a couple of friends are sort of messing around and they pick on each other? Well, we were kinda doing that. But then Rachel and Yuhan kinda teamed up and it just felt like it was going a bit too far. Then Rachel said something she knows better than to say, and Yuhan built on it jokingly - I don't think he realised. It just kinda got out of hand, and I went into one of my defensive quiet moods where I just kinda drift off into thought.

But yeah... you know those moments when joking goes a little too far and one person winds up hurt? It was like that, only I don't think they realised I was upset and they just kept going until I was well and truly steeped in a state I wasn't coming out of until the next morning at the soonest. Seeing Alex later was good, though; he got me to smile.

The next day I went to a job interview at the Bakery where Kiersten, Panda and Luke work. That went really well; the woman who was interviewing me was 20 minutes late, and I was 20 minutes early, giving me 40 minutes in which to get acquainted with some of the staff and have a nice long conversation with Noelene. Noelene is lovely.

I finally did get to talk to Roberta though, and she said that I should come in for a Trial Shift on Tuesday (today). More on that later.

After that I went to work, worked my shift, then afterwards had the most brilliant spa with Felicity, Ash, and Ash's boyfriend Brad. Ash and Brad stayed at my place that night and we spent the next day playing, it was wonderful. Brad is really great, I'm glad that Ash wound up with him.

Saturday was my date with Jay. That was good, except that Aunt Kerri needed us to house-sit for us. The dinner was less romantic than I'd hoped, the walk home was bland, and we just wound up watching The Dark Knight on Aunt Kerri's couch, having a rather less-than-fun spa together because the spa jets sucked and Aunt Kerri's house was uncomfortable.... we even wound up sleeping on the couch, not even next to each other - on opposite ends, because it was a skinny L-shaped couch.

Okay... to be completely honest? Saturday sucked. It wasn't the date I was hoping for at all. I was quite disappointed...

Anyways. Sunday I got Lisa to take Kasey and I to Dandenong and we caught the train from Dandenong into the city, met up with Kasey and Shelagh. Now, previously, the group to go see Ecosexual was:

Alex, Yuhan, Kirra, Shelagh, Tara, Kasey, Big Rachel, Bryan, Bryan's boyfriend Sam and I.

By the time Tara/Shelagh/Kasey/I met up, it was just Tara, Kasey and I that were going - even Shelagh couldn't go! I called Joel to see if he wanted to go and he couldn't, and even Bryan couldn't meet up with us! So it turns out that only Tara, Kasey and I went, and it was SPECTACULAR.

There was a girl covered in black balloons.
There was an indoor trapeze swing.
There was a fire-twirler performing Poi with streamerballs instead of fire.

It was FANTASTIC.

Anyway. Afterwards, Kasey/Tara/I wandered the city for a bit, then we went back to Footscray where Tara lives. At the footscray train station we sort of witnessed what we believe to be a mugging - we got out of there and called the cops. It was quite scary.

Monday Kasey and I made our way home, and I mostly rested. Then, today, Tuesday, I had my trial day at the bakery. Within an hour I was familiar with all the computer and processing equipment and systems, then after that I memorised what all the different pie crusts mean and what's in what, what's where, what tongs to use with which products, etc. It was fairly easy. After that I went to Foodworks and told Russel I only want to work Night Fill from now on, except for my Thursday Shift which I'll keep not so much for my sake, but so that he doesn't have to find someone to replace me before Summer.

Anyways. After that I went to Cowes with Sasha, a new friend of mine, came home, hung out with Brooke and Panda at the park, and called Jay when I got home. After getting home, though, tonight has kind of dissipated into a semi-melancholy. I dunno... there's not much I can do about it.

Well. This Thursday I'm working, possibly Spa-ing with Felicity that night. Friday I'm working at the Bakehouse again, which will be good. Then Saturday, Dracula's for Emerald's birthday. I'm staying at Tara's this Saturday night, coming home on Sunday, and after that my life will become Work / Save / Work / Save / Work / Save. I'm praying to God that I get into Vic Uni - I've heard their Student Accommodation is only $120 a week including Water/Electricity/Broadband, so hopefully I get there. I'm even thinking of getting a $300 laptop with an $80 External Hard-Drive, which will help me SO much.

Anyway guys, that's the update for this week.

Thanks for reading. Much love to all of you.

Xx Ricky.

P.S., Alex. I just remembered that you read my journals, and would appreciate it if you didn't mention to Yuhan why I was in that mood last week. Sorry... I kinda felt I had to include it in the journal, but I don't know that he'd entirely understand if you did tell him. I'd rather not explain what it was that Rachel joked about, but I'm fairly sure he didn't realise that it was one of those taboo subjects.

Thanks in advance if you do decide not to tell him. If not, I guess that's your choice anyway. Hopefully I'll get to see you some time soon. Xx